Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
