what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
