Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
