You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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