he wants to bone in the snuggie
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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