I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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