There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
