My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
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