I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
