If i come over, it means nothing
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
