when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
