I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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