it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
