hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Come share oat with me in your robe
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Randomize
