I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
