and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
