i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
We have started to decorate penises.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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