when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
