Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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