my phone cant type all the emotion im having
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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