im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
