I'm drive I can fine osifer
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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