got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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