Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Randomize
