I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
