How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
