As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
home. puking in laundry basket.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
