i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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