He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
bring money and cleavage
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
