I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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