there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
