Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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