i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Randomize
