5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
