A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
