dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Alive.
So much puke
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Randomize
