watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize