We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
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