Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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