It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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