WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
