we have officially lost it.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
