At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
