you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
