you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
