your room smells of hookers.
And success
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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