I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
