i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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