Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
