There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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